12 Comments

This is really well written, particularly the way you strip out unnecessary words - is that called asyndeton? Is it going to end up as a fantasy/imaginative fiction? I think that would be a shame - I like it as it is - a sort of downbeat magic realism I think - Oh yeah and 'redscream on their faces' sounds like something out of Blood Meridian and there is no higher praise than that in my house

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Jul 18Liked by Victor D. Sandiego

A whole universe packed into a handful of tight paragraphs. No parts wasted. Nicely done.

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Jul 18Liked by Victor D. Sandiego

Quality

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Jul 18Liked by Victor D. Sandiego

"An inauspicious visionary." A gritty, powerful piece Victor. You break the rules with your structure and pound meaning into every word. I always drop what I'm doing when I see a post from you.

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I really enjoyed this, Victor! Felt a little different than some of your others.

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Jul 23Liked by Victor D. Sandiego

Hello Victor

Simply happy to arrive at this moment of delight reading the "flotsam and jetson" of your stream-of consciousness. It is precisely the unstructured (breaking rules) pieces left from the shipwreck of life than helps some stay afloat. Thank you for sharing your gift!

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